Today

Sitting cross legged on my couch, computer on lap, from my perch in Brooklyn Heights I can look out my living room window and see the hole in the sky where the Twin Towers used to be.

Like most people, I remember nearly every single detail of that day - being at work early for a new business meeting, standing in front of the gas station at 6th Avenue and Spring street and watching the second plane hit the tower and still not comprehending that it was terrorism, my friend Lisa showing up at my office who was in Soho and had just seen the Towers fall, my friend Erin from work who had another fight with her on-again off-again boyfriend Jake the night before, who just started his new job at Cantor Fitzgerald a few weeks earlier...

Today, with the news of Osama Bin Laden's death, all the information and disinformation of that time flooded back:

The way the air smelled for two months after, as the building burned until Thanksgiving. The missing people signs all over lower Manhattan. Bars full of people, dulling the pain, and wanting to connect. Break ups and make ups. Everyone in a bad mood, about a month later, when the shock was wearing off and New York was just a hard place to get around with all the security barricades. Fighter jets overhead at night. The Mayor and the President telling everyone to come to New York and to go shopping. Having a 'big boozy' lunch, two days after September 11th, with my friend Dave and Jodi, and all deciding we were moving to California....

All day today I kept thinking something was wrong with me because I didn't have that "The Yankees won!" feeling inside. I felt somber and reflective, not celebratory, and have avoided turning on the television since I got home.

Then I saw this...

"I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that." - Martin Luther King Jr.